How to talk to your Guests about Postponing the Wedding

“You can plan a pretty picnic but you can’t predict the weather.”



Yes, yes I did just quote Outkast. You know, a plethora of unpredictable things that you didn’t plan for are in the ream of possibility—and your wedding is not exempt. While its never something a couple wants to consider, sometimes all that unpredictability means that postponement has become the best option.

There are a million reasons a date could need to be shifted– from an essential family member being sick, to natural disasters, to an ideal vendor becoming unavailable. Cut to our current situation: a global pandemic which is screeching the brakes on the event industry, impacting everything from  non-essential travel, to how many people can gather together.

So where does this leave us with weddings? First, it’s important to tell your guest list that you will be changing the date as soon as that call is made. “My advice is to get your wedding party and parents involved,” says Kimberly Carmen, of  A Southern Engagement. Collecting all those emails can be a daunting task. “Break the list into sections based on who each person may know and ask them for help.” she advises.

Read on for tips on how to keep everyone on your guest list in loop and keep your wedding on their calendars. I know how important it is to let your nearest and dearest know that you’d still love to see you tie the knot—just on a (revised) date!

First, talk to your inner circle

As mentioned, speaking to your immediate families and wedding crew as soon as you know the date will change will make the whole transition worlds easier. If someone else is footing the bill, it might be best to talk to them first in order to ensure they are available for any potential changes in your plans. Next, enlist the help of other immediate relatives and any bridesmaids or groomsmen to spread the word, collect email addresses, and even involve them in the choice of a new date if their schedules are a priority for you. Be prepared that a change in date could mean that some of them are unavailable, but it could also mean schedules are more flexible for guests that were unavailable for the original date!

Inform the Masses

Whether your wedding is a year away, or was supposed to happen this month,  the more notice you give to your family and friends, the more likely they’ll be able to attend on your new date. E-mail guests as soon as you have collected the addresses with the help of your crew. When you make you announcement (or say it’s postponed TBD), the details your share are up to you.

Most people who had plans currently will understand as we are all getting put on hold, and those who need to know all the details will likely be in the loop with you already. A simple line such as “We recognize all that is currently happening worldwide, and because of this, we have made the choice to postpone the festivities surrounding our wedding. We hope you all will be able to join us at a later date.” will more than do the trick.


Update that Wedding Website

If you have decided to use a wedding website to keep guests informed (which is a fantastic choice, in my opinion) adding an announcement on the homepage about changing plans is a great way for guests to reference updates. As you nail down the details of  a new date and logistics like hotel availability and  room blocks (if different), continue to update the website to keep guests in on the plans.

Don’t forget to Keep your Chin up

If your wedding is being postponed, keep calm. While it is unmistakably disappointing, the entire world has been put on temporary hold and we are all making adjustments.

In fact, in these crazy, unforseen times, perhaps it’s more important than ever to remember what this is all about: Marrying your partner and starting a life together, and keeping your loved ones safe and happy in the process.  If anything, this pandemic is causing all of us to take a look at the priorities surrounding our lives, our loved ones, and the events that fill up our time. Perhaps after all, we can reflect on these events and the choices we are making so that always, our weddings are filled with intention and love.
What are your thoughts? Let me know in the comments!

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